Every day we ask our minds and bodies to do just a little bit more, slowly but surely increasing it’s workload until it says ‘no more!‘.
This is how my mind and body feels at the moment.
With the end of the financial year approaching it is silly season for cramming in your unused annual leave at work. As I do a job share role when my ‘other half’ is on annual leave or training I am expected to work those additional hours. Normally I don’t mind as it means I get to see the workload through for a whole week without having to handover parts of it or have emails sent about what it left to do etc. At the moment however, those extra hours are a chore, they are something I must do and I don’t want to do them. We are short in our areas of our staffing rota and I feel bad saying I can’t do the additional hours so I find myself once again sitting at my desk wishing I had spoken up.
I seem to go through phases in my life when I drift from wanting to sleep at every possible moment to those where I would love to go to sleep but I just don’t seem to be able to. At the moment I am swaying between being so very tired so I can;t wait to go to bed on an evening, however, I am waking several times a night either from night sweats or peculiar dreams. I have always been one for having bizarre dreams, one of my most funniest ones has to be about the Teletubbies swinging from a signpost at a crossroads and slowly getting faster and faster before they launched off in four different directions.
This is a real first world problem but with so little time between work and school runs and doing errands etc. having use of a car really does make my life easier. With having no car for almost two months now and my body is starting to feel the strain. Tigger walks at a snails pace to and from pre-school everyday, a simple 20 minute walk at the most can easily turn into 45 minutes when he feeling particularly slow. Some days I have had to resort to taking the pushchair as I have a to do list a mile long and quite frankly I need to get on.
Mum’s don’t get days off
Myself along with Mum’s up and down the country days off come very few and far between. With Tigger attending pre-school on Tuesday and Thursday mornings even though I am at home was originally meant so that I could catch up with sharing things on here as well as the odd errand etc. However, my two mornings a week have either been taken up with covering my job share, attending workshops at the school or sorting out the car etc. By the time the weekend comes Roo and Tigger want to go out and do lots of different activities whilst I am attempting to play catch up with the housework or getting this scheduled on here.
All in all I’m exhausted if the truth be told, however ask me to my face how I am doing and you will get the response of ‘I’m good, thanks‘ or ask me to doing something for you ‘of course‘ I reply.
I need to let my mind and body rest, allow it to catch up on all the extras I have been asking of them and recharge my batteries… not quite sure how I am going to do this though.