5 Tips to Handle Criticism from Other Mums

May 14, 2020

From the time you announce your pregnancy to literally every stage of your little one’s growth and progress, you’ll find yourself surrounded by advice-givers and those who criticise or question every single thing that you do. Motherhood is a tough job as it is, and when you’re criticised by those around you, things can get even more difficult for you, especially mentally. 

If that’s something you’re struggling with, here’s a bit of help your way. Read on to discover 5 simple and effective ways to handle criticism from other mums and family members.

Accept Judgement

A lot of us have a hard time with this one. We try too hard to present the perfect picture of ourselves, overworking ourselves. In the end, we always end up being judged, and that’s actually just how things are. Remember that no matter what you do, there’ll always be someone who prefers to do things differently, and will judge you, question you, and maybe even criticise you. That doesn’t necessarily mean you’re wrong. It just means you’re different, or rather, they are. 

Do What you Want

You might be getting criticised regarding your parenting techniques by other mums around you- it could be your friends or even your own mum or mother-in-law. They may even be pushy at times, and if that’s the case, just politely disagree and do things as you want to do. When you do this a couple of times, that person will eventually back out and stop with the negativity and unsolicited advice. This is another golden gem for new mums trying to handle criticism.

Get Down With the Facts

You might have some different ideas and approaches towards parenting your little one, and that someone may not be agreeing with it. In such a case, you can consider getting down with the facts about it all and how and why your approach is the better choice. Talk about how it worked best for other mums you know- that should help that person stay at a safe distance verbally for a while.

Trust Yourself

Parenting is nothing less than a mental struggle, and when you’re surrounded by those who doubt you and make you question yourself and what you do as a mother, it can be even more difficult. During such times, make sure you trust yourself, no matter what. Have full faith in yourself and your parenting abilities and know that you are the best mother your child could ever have. Remember that you’re doing your best, trusting your instincts, and in the end, doing everything that you can to give your little one a happy life, and that’s actually all that matters.

Open Up 

If everything else doesn’t work out, and you’re still stuck with a pushy someone who can’t stop commenting on everything that you do, just be upfront about it. Have a clear discussion about how you don’t like them shaming you and pressurizing you to do things their way and state that you would like to parent your child your own way because you are really the one who knows best for your child. 

  • Bryanna May 19, 2020 at 3:31 pm

    I have heard that the mum community can be really overwhelming, so thanks for sharing all these tips!

  • Rebecca Smith May 19, 2020 at 3:42 pm

    So true. I’ve learned to do what I want and accept the judgement – after all, I don’t actually have to take notice of it unless they’ve got a valid point.

  • Rachel Craig May 23, 2020 at 1:53 am

    Babies and children are so loved. So much choice in regards to baby items, etc. As a new Mum, there is a need for self care :- Rest, Recovery, Relaxation, Recuperation, Sleep, Sufficient Hydration, Nutritous meals / food / diet. A healthy, well nourished, well rested Mum is likely to be able to interact well with baby and others. Partner / Parent may assist new Mum.

    Perhaps best to prepare for adaptation to Motherhood before the event, and with individuals/s who will be providing support / assistance in the early days. Being tired and needing to readjust:- Probably need nurturing, no pressures. Baby will be with you as family, and will get used to your routinue and ways.

    With time and experience confidence will increase. Enjoy! Don’t expect every day to go well. Remember to have a life. You may be a Mum, but you are still you (a person, as well as other aspects of yourself, your roles, etc). Remember you have choices.

    Good blog, as there can be a need to remain aware. Remember others have their own views, you don’t have to agree with them. You can choose to change the topic of conversation, excuse your self e.g. To toilet, return home, etc. Your self esteem is important, take good care of it, and yourself.

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