July always feels like a split month, the first half with life semi-normal with schoolwork to be completed. Whilst the second half, once school is out for the summer, feels completely different. A somewhat more relaxed way of life with the focus on fun and laughter.
I’ve felt somewhat out of sorts this month. Whilst the lockdown plays it’s part on my emotions, I think it’s more of overall exhaustion that has hit me this month. I’m tired of everything at the moment, from the everyday chores, family issues, financial worries and a feeling of just not being good enough. Things aren’t likely to change anytime soon so I just need to keep my head down and get on with it.
Life continues in lockdown, adhering to social distancing measures and only heading out for essential journeys. As I worked from home before all of this kicked off, life, on one hand, hasn’t changed that much for me. On the other hand, we have less money coming in as my earning have all but stopped (thank goodness for the little bit of help from the SEISS grant). The children are home from school and we can’t head out on family adventures. But in the grand scheme of things we are very lucky to be surviving the current way of life.
It’s been a little over a month since the social distancing and lockdown measures were introduced. During this time we have transitioned the children into completing school work from home. Adjusting to a new normal and finding ways to have our own time and space whilst we are all in the same house.
Life as we once knew it has changed substantially over the course of the month. What was once just something we heard about on the news from the other side of the world is now very much a reality. Making us step back, close our doors and hope that our loved ones manage to get through without harm.
This month has tested me in so many ways. With my wellbeing on the edge of coping at times. I’ve attempted to maintain that graceful swan-like appearance throughout the thick of things. Whilst crumbling when I’m alone with my thoughts finally catching up with me. Thank goodness for long car journeys, although the sight of a woman crying behind the wheel might have looked a little odd to passing motorists.
The Christmas decorations have been packed away after another festive season. Blue Monday has been and gone, and for the most part, I’ve survived the first month of the year. And, of course, the new decade. If I’m honest this month has been about recovery from the previous one.
Oh, December! What a month you have been, from some wonderful highs to almost the lowest points that you could possibly face. Whilst I’d never truly want to wish my time away, I think I can safely say that I’m pleased to be heading towards the end of the month. Thanking December for the wake-up call it has given but happily waving goodbye to some of the long hours and days that I’ve experienced.
As the end of the year closes in I’m starting to feel quite melancholy. There isn’t one particular thing that is making me feel this way. Rather a host of small things, probably insignificant to most people. All of which are chipping away at me. I’ve attempted to distract myself from the majority of things, however, there are some things that no matter what I do still manage to whizz around my mind.
October has felt a little strange, which I’m putting down to the fact that half term is a week earlier than I would normally have thought it to be. With the children going to be at school on Halloween, leaving us little time to prepare for the night of festivities ahead. Our estate goes all out on Halloween with lots of houses decorated and pumpkins out on display to signal that the children can knock on the door for a treat.